We Welcome Your Comments

Posted in: Community | 143 Comments »

You are invited to share your thoughts on this page. In keeping with our theme of hope and recovery and to make sure you leave feeling better rather than as if you’ve received a mega dose of  ‘let’s get depressed’ pills, we ask that you write about the positive aspects of your recovery process. You can write as much or as little as you like regarding any progress you are making, or a positive statement, a quote or anything that others may find encouraging.

This way the message board will be so uplifting, anyone having a challenging day can stop by and leave feeling rejuvenated and optimistic.

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143 Responses to “We Welcome Your Comments”

  1. Bliss says:

    “We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
    ~ Viktor Frankl

  2. Steve says:

    Hello Everyone I am sorry it has been a while I just wanted give Everyone an update I am 8 days off klonopin it is like everyday I am healing. I really do not think there are enough words to give Praise for this site. I found this site when i could not sleep I think is was 2 or 3 am I was sitting and crying not know what was going on with Me I had alot of test after having a bad spell with my body My muscle’s went crazy I was on levaquin at this time the best they came up with is I had a toxic reaction and would up with nerve damage after see the neuro doctor i was put on klonopin I must say after being put on this drug my body was able to rest I was so weak at the time going on the klonopin I could not hardly walk. After a year and a half on the drug things started happening deep burning in My legs and arms twitching eyes face arms I would go back to the neuro doctor and He would just say Your nerves are healing and every time I went back he would get a little more unfriendly I would say doctor My condition is worse he just acted mad the last time I seen Him. Just to say this site helped save Me Do not be afraid to search for answer’s on the Internet But please do not scare Yourself more You will find very good help. Even When I found this site I had went back to the doctor and asked the doctor could this be a side effect of the the klonopin He was like Your condition is more important than the side effects of the klonopin HE WAS WRONG. Bliss Thanks a Million Times over for being here and Everyone here that has shared there experience’s. My Prayer’s Every day go out to You and Your Family and all the People Hurting from this drug. Steve is now Benzo free thank God.

    Reply:

    Congratulations on being benzo-free, Steve! Thanks for updating us and for your kind wishes to everyone. We are really pleased that the information here has helped you to figure things out. Now that you are benzo-free, may your recovery continue to unfold with more and more improvements as time goes by. Wishing you all the very best. Here’s to good health! :-)

  3. Bliss says:

    This post is on the Recovery Road Wellness Page and on my FaceBoook page but I am putting it here for anyone with no access to FaceBook. Here it is:

    “No matter what you may be facing, never let go of HOPE. The day will come when you will be fully recovered… when everything you hoped for is achieved. Then you will think back to this time and smile. You will be filled with a sense of accomplishment because you made it, and you will feel content and profoundly grateful. So today, relax… release your anxieties, and let HOPE guide your way on.”

    Here is the link to the page: http://www.facebook.com/RecoveryRoadWellness

  4. recovered + happy says:

    come on here to say my news. my nightmare is over and i came on here to tell anyone still having bad symptoms dont give up and dont never doubt that you are healing. for a long time i did not have any windows and even after the first one i rarely had any. i thought i would never heal the pain, inner trembling, rage, cryin all the time, burning, thoughts ocd, tinnitus, racing heart beating loudly in my ears, electrical shots thruout my body, headaches, insomnia, serously i used to feel i would die at anytime.

    then i slowly started to feel better. i was on elavin when i was 20 then later prozac and added to temazepam then valium so i was on a lot of stuff for a long time, i am 43 yrs, cold-turkey off elavin and prozac and temazepam before finding out to taper so taper off valium but i used to feel the damage was done.

    took my last valium in 2008 no window till 2010 everyday i cried, wanted to die, kill myself - wrote to bliss for help and she wrote to me every day for more than a year telling me to hold on, remind myself i am healing, lie down and listen to positive CDs, tell myself this too shall pass!LOL angel in disguise. thank you from the bottom of my heart.

    i don’t have any symptoms now everything is gone away since febuary aND I never had a window for more than a few days so i know i am healed.

    dont give up dont worry if it looks like nothing is happening and you feeling like your brain is damaged. the benzo brain is healing no matter if you dont have any breaks or windows. the self-help stuff works. when bliss suggested to try them in the beginning i didn’t want to it sounded farfetch and i was in a lot of pain, shakin and so on. but i start with the breathing and then listening to medtations i was too sick to do them properly but i wud play them all the time and they wud take my mind off my pain.

    dont give up. this madness finally comes to an end. i am very happy and relived. i almost lost my girlfriend and my kids are grown but they were fed up with me and didnt believe it was the meds. we are making up now. i have my life back and my family back. it is a good feeling. your day will come. you have to be patient and find positive ways to spend the time you wait. good luck to all of you. paul

    Reply:

    Dear Paul,

    This is wonderful news!! I am sooo happy for you. Congratulations and well done! :-) Thank you for sharing with us; this will encourage many who still having troubling symptoms. I notice you haven’t mentioned even half of the symptoms you had so I can only imagine that withdrawal is becoming a distant memory for you - just wonderful. All the best to you and to your family. Enjoy your life!

  5. prayerful says:

    Bliss, do you know of people who got over the withdrawal symptom feeling like they are on a bobbing boat all day? Or the sensation that the ground is moving, or that of the ground feeling slanted? That has been my main symptom. Most people talk about spinning vertigo and that it went away. But I am despairing because I find on many forums that people have had similar symptoms as mine persisting for years. I don’t know what to think anymore. Sorry that I cannot be more positive at present. I am recovering from a cold turkey off 2.5mg Ambien and am 2 months off. (I do find that my symptoms are more bearable if I’m less anxious.)

    Reply:

    Dear Prayerful,

    Thank you for sharing. Yes, I do know of many who have these symptoms and they have recovered. At 2 months off it is understandable that this is happening. I know it can be quite worrying but it will eventually go. I had the bobbing early on in my taper - I even had all the shocks on my car changed because at first I thought it was a problem with the car! Then during acute withdrawal the ground (and furniture) started moving and yes, I remember the floor appearing to be slanted. People on television appeared one dimensional; it was sooo weird!! Of course, all of this disappeared as my recovery progressed and now I can smile about it.

    So, please don’t let the comments of those still struggling make you despair. It is much too early to even entertain any thoughts of lingering symptoms. Remember that the ones whose symptoms disappeared have no need to return to the forums. This is why we don’t hear from them. Try not to let those unfortunate accounts cause you to worry. Give yourself time to recover… You’ll eventually notice improvements and, when the timing is right for you, your nervous system will learn to function well again without the drug and the symptoms will go.

    Don’t give yourself a time-frame, just take things one day at a time. Find ways of coping with the symptoms, make “peace” with them, accept them as a necessary path to your healing, breathe, ride the waves, and make the best of each day. All of this will pass…. :-)

  6. Judith says:

    (book) http://shop.fpmt.org/Sutra-of-Golden-Light_p_621.html

    youtube mantra of great compassion and healing: http://youtu.be/zBQfUqd8pqI

    Thank you Bliss, thank you for not leaving us behind. I keyed in on what you said about having symptoms that you would not share. Thanks for saying that. Lately I have been having those kinds of symptoms and wondering if I can get through this. Of course it is human to see ourselves as unique and that no one else can suffer as much as us. We need to struggle to not believe that. Then we are appalled at how much people can suffer. And people are resilient. I am counting on that. I would like to share a couple things that helped me get through the most difficult times. One is Mantra and I did that every day. I made a game of memorizing mantras. Then they would pop into my head and replace the anxious thoughts. Whatever positive energy, to memorize it. Psalms and prayers would be good. I’m a Buddhist so this is what worked for me. I don’t consider Buddhism a religion but rather it is a philosophy (of feeling better). A big help was this sutra book. I didn’t have to understand what I was reading and it is a book of very positive energy. Sutras are written by Buddha so it is indeed positive energy. The second YouTube link is a mantra of great compassion, a healing mantra. It was a long one to memorize but I had time. Nature also helps me. In my first year, I built a new garden every week. Now I can enjoy it much more.
    With love to everyone
    Judith

    Reply:

    Thank you for sharing this, Dear Judith. We appreciate your doing so and I’m sure many will benefit from it.

    With much Love,
    Bliss

  7. Heather says:

    This is so good and true Baylissa! In the beginning when my w/d felt overwhelming I would repeat over and over the affirmations you wrote for anxiety and EVERY time it grounded me and calmed me. I used book reading as my main distraction and kept the anxiety affirmations as my bookmark. I could then read my affirmation bookmark whenever I started to feel anxious. Another surprisinly helpful distraction I used was to color Mandela’s I found online and printed off. I found it to be very soothing. One last thing that continues to help me, is a binder I created that has affirmations, quotes, stories, blog articles, prayers and scriptures that are encouraging. (Anything positive) 1/2 of what is in the binder is not directly related to Benzo w/d but is something I found to be helpful and encouraging. On rough days I pull out the binder and draw strength and positive energy from it. Keep the faith and knowledge and “that this too shall pass.” Thank you Baylissa for the encouragement and wise words!

  8. RiyaButler says:

    Hello there Pals,
    Just joined the gang. Hope to have very good time here.

    luv
    Riya

  9. val says:

    Brilliant post Baylissa, you’re soooo good with words xx

  10. Bliss says:

    Coping With Your Withdrawal

    So many of you have been going through rough patches these past weeks, I’d like to share the following with the hope that it will help in some way.

    In the “Benzo-Wise” book I’ve suggested coping tools based on my experience and what people who coped best with the most intense symptoms have said helped them: i.e. breathing techniques, mindfulness, positive self-talk, affirmations, relaxation CDs, etc.

    First of all, there is nothing far-fetched about these approaches. They are not ‘my’ methods. Mental health organisations, psychologists, counselors, doctors who are open-minded and other professionals will confirm that breathing, mindfulness and positive self-talk are some of the most effective tools for coping with any kind of psychological challenge. If you phone an anxiety helpline out-of-hours, what will you hear? A kind voice guiding you through a breathing exercise. This is standard and it is so for a valid reason: it works.

    What I learned early on in withdrawal - and I am still always so grateful for this - is that because the root of the withdrawal problem is the healing (up-regulating) of the receptors/the repair of one’s nervous system (which unfortunately is an issue of TIME), nothing but TIME will lead to recovery. The only way out, is through. Once I acknowledged this, my next questions were, “How will I fill this time in a way that gives me the most peace and causes me the least distress?” and “How can I keep my already hyped, overly sensitive nervous system as calm as possible?”

    Not every coping tool will work for everyone. But to dismiss all suggestions without trying is not the best thing to do. We live in a culture of quick fixes, pills and instant gratification. Alas, there is no quick fix for withdrawal. It may take days or a few weeks of speaking positively to oneself before the energy shifts and little glimmers of hope surface. But even that is better than spending week after week in mental turmoil and despair. Why not experiment and possibly derive some good from it? I can’t tell you how many benzo friends who were skeptics at first were later surprised to have found something that worked! Maybe you will too?

    If the pain and other symptoms are severe or the agitation is too intense to sit quietly, that’s okay too. I remember occasions when I would sit on the floor rocking back and forth in agony and being so unwell I couldn’t meditate or focus on anything. What I did, though, was to put a CD I liked on ‘repeat’ and listen to it for hours at a time. I was alone and there was no one to reassure me. I knew I needed to have something with positive energy even remotely in my awareness. Was it uplifting at the time? Not immediately. What it did was distract me from constantly thinking about the symptoms and the scary thoughts I was having. I wasn’t a member of a forum then (not sure if this was a good or bad thing), I didn’t compare notes with other ex-users, and whenever I freaked out, I would ask myself if I was 100% certain that the things I was worrying about happening – like I may never heal – would actually happen. The answer would always be “No!”

    Some of the symptoms I experienced will never be shared. Yes, I will admit that in the ‘Benzo-Wise’ book, I did not state many of my symptoms although I listed them in the A-Z at the back. It would have scared those who were undecided about coming off their meds into taking them for life! :-) There are probably about three symptoms that I’ve heard of in the past six years that I actually didn’t have during my own withdrawal. Many times I thought there was no way I would make it. But I did, and YOU WILL TOO.

    Gentle reminder: Withdrawal is NOT a terminal illness. Yes, it can be a nightmare, but you wake up from it and you get your life back, you get “you” back, things return to normal and for many, life is even better than before. Still, to make the journey least problematic, you MUST hone in on all the tools that are available. See if there is a breathing or other technique that works for you.

    And reason with yourself when you notice the downward spiral of scary thoughts beginning. Tell yourself:

    “Because it happened to him/her, it doesn’t mean it will happen to me. Everyone’s recovery process is different.”

    “Gosh, where did these thoughts come from? Nothing I’m worried about is definitely, undoubtedly going to happen. Stop!” :-)

    “Why am I forgetting that withdrawal ends, even when it takes this long? Better to tell myself that this too, shall pass.”

    It is always a relief to know that not everyone has a difficult time withdrawing from benzos or antidepressants. Some experience little or no problems. However, for those who do, it can be a most unfortunate experience. If you belong to the latter group, please, please… consider finding out more about mindfulness, breathing, etc. And if nothing works, you can even invent your own technique. Some people make up their own statements that they use as an anchor. So if a sudden anxiety attack, adrenaline rush, rage or anything like that happens, they repeat that statement (sometimes zealously, with determination and resolve) and it helps to ground them.

    There are other ways to be mindful. One is to chant. It is distracting, brings you back to the present moment, there are elements of sound healing, and it can be very comforting and relaxing. Some people say “Nam Myoho Renge Kyo” or “Om Mani Padme Hum” or chant with a rosary. During withdrawal I had a CD with “Om Mani Padme Hum” which I found to be very uplifting. If you are a person of faith, pray for patience, acceptance and recovery. Whatever works, use it.

    So, the safest way to find a coping tool is to experiment with whatever you find to be even mildly pleasant, that you are fairly certain is not stimulating and will not cause a flare-up of symptoms. That rules out medication, supplements, rigorous exercise, alcohol, caffeine, sweets, preservatives, MSG, etc.

    The other important thing to do is to find a way to make peace with what is happening. I know it isn’t always easy to do this but this single attitude can make a world of difference in terms of how you cope. If you can stop fighting what is happening, surrender, be patient and at peace with what is, you will have an easier time and anxiety will be kept to a minimum. Constant resistance, complaining about your symptoms and any other focus on what is going wrong only makes your situation worse. You must take charge - not by trying to control the recovery process, but by not giving your benzo experience more power than it has - not allowing it to totally consume you. And never think of yourself as a victim; it is dis-empowering, self-defeating, and will make you feel even more vulnerable. Be gentle with yourself but firm in your resolve to find ways of coping well.

    If you haven’t tried to find a breathing technique, or listened to a few CDs or YouTube clips, if you haven’t experimented with mindfulness, if you haven’t searched for distractions like non-stimulating games, watercolor painting, abstract art (this is good because nothing needs to make sense to anyone else but you! :-) ), if you aren’t speaking positively to yourself, then you’re not allowing your best possible recovery journey to unfold. No matter what you’re going through today, there is something that will bring you HOPE and make your day lighter. Promise yourself to explore this further. Go on… give it a go… and see what gems you find!

    Sending you lots of positive energy and wellness vibes
    Bliss (Baylissa)

    ps: For easy reference here are some links:

    Mindfulness: http://recovery-road.org/resources-centre/coping/mindfulness/

    Breathing: http://recovery-road.org/resources-centre/coping/breathing-techniques/

    Om Mani Padme Hum YouTube clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4noQ0MD1_8s

    Nam Myoho Renge Kyo YouTube clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNbU2-9YcGI

    Healing Meditation - Kelly Howell: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFh-Km4AXeE

    Wellbeing Podcasts from the Mental Health Foundation: http://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/help-information/podcasts/

    Hay House Radio: http://www.hayhouseradio.com/

    Other Coping Tools: http://recovery-road.org/resources-centre/coping/other/

    (These are just a few but there is a wealth of resources on the internet so keep looking, you’ll find something that works well for you.)

  11. Lori says:

    Still have a bad time with the symptoms but I won’t let it get me down. Bliss said make peace with symptoms & accept what happening. I did and I feel better now I said why I am freaking out when I know Im going to heal? Not wasting any more energy stressing about this. These symptoms wont control me anymore. One day they will go and while I wait I will take it easy. Less stress for me. We will beat this nightmare for sure I promise. Good luck to all.

  12. tanya says:

    I do want to let people know that despite my symtoms I am better than I was last year at this time, and doing more than I was able to then. It’s not where I want to be but, it’s better than it was. having someone to talk to , that knows this stuff really well helps.Thanks Wobbley……

  13. tanya says:

    19 months off, still alot of symtoms,terrible obsessive thoughts,brain fog, negative thoughts,irrational fearful thoughts, alot of physcological symtoms, they have diminished ssome, and I do participate in life more. I’m trying to be positiveand at times feel more so,but doesn’t last. I am a fighter, I will get better at some point,I won’t give up, never did before in my life, It is a hard and scary journey.At my worse times GOD pulled me thru, when I didn’t think I’d see the next day, I’M STILL HERE…. Thank you bliss for not forgetting and Una and Val, much Love………….

  14. nick says:

    Hi Baylissa,

    I m having a very hard time with physical symptoms at the moment and i never grow tired of reading and rereading success stories. I really need them Sometimes i have the feeling that this ordeal is just unbearable, that i m at the end of my rope: i m 21 months out and still suffer direly… I ve got to keep believing in recovery, whatever happens. I think i have over-exerted myself lately, i could enjoy a few good windows so far and have acted as if i had “nothing”. Bad idea! Thank god, the primary mental symptoms are gone (anxiety,depression).
    For 10 days , i ve been brought to my knees again, so i just wanted to communicate a little with you…thx again for your book and support..
    take care

  15. abenzofriend says:

    when you’re in severe withdrawal it can feel like the world is going to end. you think you’re not gonna make it to and you will never recover. lol i know i did and then one day i stopped fighting and surrendered. i just said i give up. when i wrote to bliss she told me to breathe through it, not to worry about tomorrow, everything would pass. i started feeling more relaxed and not as anxious as before. the symptoms didn’t go right away and but they went. had to wait months longer but they went away. even if you feel like you’re dying - i had the worst physical and head stuff - you’re not dying. you’re in withdrawal. you will heal. you will get over this mess. your life will get back to normal. you will be happier. the things that used to make you worry wont matter any more. you will learn how to take care of urself without drugs. u will kick butt. if you have to go through withdrawal you will end up being a winner at life!!! seriously!!!

  16. Anita says:

    Thanks for your encouraging words, Bliss. I have been hoping the same thing-that my long slow recovery is a sign of doing it right and will keep me from weird relapses later. I am falling into depression a bit as I realize I will never get my old job back, and that makes me so sad. But thanks for all the encouragement.

    Reply:

    You are welcome, Anita. Just a little thought re your old job. Sometimes it’s difficult to even think that something better may come out of a situation like this, but I have seen so many people who end up either changing careers or doing similar work to what they did previously but better paying, more fulfilling, etc. So it’s okay to grieve the loss of your old job, then be open to the idea of having an opportunity to do something just as good or better when you are well enough to work. So many times we see one door close and a bigger and better one open! :-) Trust that this will happen for you too. And in the meantime, take good care.

  17. tammie says:

    bliss i am 16 months free off ambien and i have read every success story i can get my hands on, i read about people having windows all the time from just a few days or weeks off. it seems like everyone get windows. i feel like i am the only one to not get any windows - ever. the mental sxs are excruicating 24/7. thank you T

    Reply:

    Dear Tammie,

    I’m sorry that it seems as if you’re the only one without windows. Please don’t be discouraged. Your recovery pattern is not as uncommon it may appear. Based on what I have witnessed over the years, not everyone has windows and at 16 months off a significant number of people are yet to have a first window. There are many people who either have them later on, or not have any at all and go straight into recovery. Having windows is not guaranteed and not having them doesn’t mean that healing is not taking place! Whatever process or pattern unfolds, the reality is that recovery is certainly taking place and you WILL heal. :-)

    The other thing is that sometimes people have a few hours or days where a few symptoms lessen in intensity or temporarily disappear and they may refer to these as windows. When I wrote about my “windows” this was what I meant. Certain symptoms were persistent but the “window days” were the bearable/goodish ones.

    So, hang in there and give yourself a bit more time. As mentioned before, whether you end up having windows or not, the most important thing is that you are healing and will eventually recover. Those bizarre mental symptoms and any physical ones you may have WILL go. Try to breathe through whatever is happening at this time. Acceptance, patience and hope are handy tools while you wait. This too, shall pass…

    With kind regards and thoughts of wellness,
    Bliss

  18. nick says:

    i also suffer from this weird burning traveling pain (neck,back,hip essentially ). The intensity decreased over time, but it’s still there (at 20 months out) I took mainly antidepressants, but the after-effects seem to be very similar. This too shall pass!!
    Never give in!!

    Reply:

    Thank you for your words of encouragement, Nick. Yes, the withdrawal effects tend to be similar. Many people on antidepressants contact us to say they also use the Benzo-Wise book as it is very applicable to their situations. I am pleased to hear that your pain is lessening in intensity. Your attitude is great. As you’ve said, it will pass! :-)

  19. Anita says:

    I could sure use a whole big heap of support. I am 28 months off. Healing is happening, but it is slow. I still can’t work due to physical symptoms that just won’t let go enough. My big question for you, Bliss, is does healing ever speed up? Or is there a rate of healing for a person that doesn’t change? In which case us slow healers are in trouble. Any words of hope and wisdom for me? Thanks so much.

    Reply:

    Dear Anita,

    Thanks for being in touch. I am so sorry to hear that your recovery is slower than expected. I can appreciate that this must be frustrating at times and that you’re longing to resume normal life. Please know that having symptoms at 28 months is not unusual. And, for some reason, there are cases where the rate of healing is slower. I always think that when this happens it’s because the nervous system wants to get it “right” the first time around! :-) But this can change. I have communicated with people who had no windows with very intense symptoms and then one day most or all of the symptoms disappeared. The thing is.. there is no definite pattern, no rhyme or reason to the recovery process. I guess this is why withdrawal is one of the greatest teachers when it comes to patience!!

    The most important thing is to know that regardless of the process, the outcome will be recovery. So keep reassuring yourself that despite not seeing the progress you anticipated, your healing IS taking place and one day you’ll be able to return to work plus do all the other things you can’t do now. This is the reality of your situation. Keep your hope alive and trust that you WILL recover, just when your nervous system has it all figured out and is once again in balance.

    In the meantime take good care of yourself.

    Sending thoughts of wellness,
    Bliss

  20. Extenze says:

    Thanks

  21. Teresa says:

    Hi Bliss,
    I did post to a Judy when really should have posted to you.
    You told of this person who had this travelling pain. That was so good at describing as that is the sort of pain I have. Mine travels all the time. Well most days it does excruciatingly too in the same areas even between my toes and fingers. Unfortunately I still dont think I was really ready to make this Cut however its still early days. have had to comply with Doctor…
    Seems as though a lot of people have gone through some terrible w/d’s but I live in Hope and try to look at your website with positiveness. Thank You Bliss.

    Reply:

    Dear Teresa,

    It’s okay to reply to Judy. I’m sure she’ll be pleased to read what you’ve shared. :-) Great that you are holding on to good ol’ HOPE and are managing to find some positives. This will really help you to cope. You take good care and all the best with the continuation of your taper. You WILL make it through to recovery!!

    Sincerely,
    Bliss

  22. me says:

    If you want to get somewhere you have to know where you want to go and how to get there.
    Then never, never, never give up.”
    - NORMAN VINCENT PEALE

  23. Teresa says:

    Hello Judy I read your email to Bliss about your deep penetrating pain. It does’nt matter what areas these pains are in . I have these too its all withdrawal…very intense mine are too. You were very lucky to find a Doctor who knew all about Withdrawal too. My G,.P knows nothing and does’nt seem to want too either. I soon have to taper off 2mgs of 16mgs which apparently is 12%. My G.P could’nt even look to see how much I was on. she worked it out that I was tapering off 14mgs and that it was 7&. I dont think she was very bright. Or maybe she had other things on her mind…about other patients or though Benzo withdrawal was not important or I was Important.
    Its not really worth going to see Doctor’s about these pain. Although MAYBE sometimes it is something else and NOT withdrawal. But usually it is…
    Seems like Bliss has helped you very much.she’s very good is’nt she to put together this website. I hav’nt always been able to come on here hut hope my email will help you a bit. My 1st Cut y 1st time for long time is 0.5mgs I am going to taper this amount OFF ostarting Wednesday 27th April…
    Bye Teresa

  24. Heather says:

    You are more than you appear to be - Life is greater than you have ever known it- The best is yet to come.
    ~Ernest Holmes

  25. Judy says:

    I was reading a post on a forum. The writer spoke of your website. I came back to view it, just a few minutes ago. Wow! I have so many memories, Baylissa, of you, your sites, your sites having helped me to get through tremendous challenges. I am so glad that you continue to keep your site going and continue to reply to those who post comments. Your work, as I have said before, is helping and has helped countless numbers of people. I shall never forget my “cold-turkey”, my visiting your original site, my emailing you, your emailing me. YOU GOT ME THROUGH THE HORRORS OF A C/T and I shall be eternally grateful!

    I continue to be tapering off of Klonopin. It has been rough. I am down to .5mgs and am having relentless, horrific pain in my upper/lower back and right abdomen. I even went to E.R. yesterday for a Dilaudid injection. Small favor! I had relief for about 45 minutes.

    It surely would be great to read if others have had such tension, such penetrating pain in the same areas as I have. I just never can figure out if this all is due to withdrawal or from an injury. No professional has been able to discern the cause. Amazingly, (and I mean amazingly), the E.R. doc who treated me told me much about “benzo withdrawal”, explaining to me how it causes the type of pain that I am having! I was shocked and mightily impressed. He was the FIRST doctor to explain withdrawal to me. I had barely told him a thing, (just telling him my beliefs about my pain), and he started telling me what was the cause of it! AMAZING! Not even my current prescribing p-doc has explained withdrawal to me. I have told her countless times about my pain and she never attributes it to withdrawal, implying that I have a “conversion disorder”. I still am amazed that this E.R. doc was so incredibly informed! Wow! I guess some doctors are, finally, being educated.

    Ah, I am long-winded tonight. My apologies. I just wanted to thank you, again, and to give you an update.

    I surely hope that all is going extremely well for you, Baylissa. Oh, how often I think of you! You are one amazing woman. Keep up the GREAT work!

    Sincerely,

    Judy

    Reply:

    Thanks Judy. I am humbled by your remarks. You are much too kind! Yes, all is well and I have a lot to be grateful for.

    It’s always good to hear from although it’s saddening to hear that you had to go to the E.R. for pain relief. Still, it’s absolutely encouraging to hear of another benzo-wise doctor - well done to him!

    I do know of others who have had this intense pain in the areas you mention. I recall one gentleman describing it as the most excruciating “travelling” pain going from back, chest to lower abdomen, up to shoulder blades and neck, then around to his side… it was most bizarre! He is fine now though and I haven’t heard from him in quite a while. Maybe he’ll pop by and read this message… Fingers crossed! :-) Or maybe another user will be able to relate and will reply to you. Anyway, I hope the pain is more manageable now (preferably gone completely) and wish you easier days ahead.

    Sincerely and with thoughts of wellness,
    Bliss

  26. Bliss says:

    “The phoenix hope, can wing her way through the desert skies, and still defying fortune’s spite, revive from ashes and rise.” ~ Miguel de Cervantes

    Wishing that you’re having a good day, dear friends. If the symptoms are acting up, try to breathe through it all and not resist. Just remind yourself that withdrawal is temporary!! One day you won’t remember much (or anything) about what’s happening today!! I see this all the time… My friends go through “benzo hell” and worry about never healing, only to find that the symptoms disappear and life returns to normal, or is even better than before!! :-) Like the phoenix, you WILL rise again.

  27. val says:

    Take time: much may be gained by patience.
    Latin Proverb

  28. Barb says:

    “Faith is not simply a patience that passively suffers until the storm is past. Rather, it is a spirit that bears things - with resignations, yes, but above all, with blazing, serene hope.”

    Corazon Aquino

  29. val says:

    “Hope has two beautiful daughters: their names are anger and courage. Anger that things are the way they are. Courage to make them the way they ought to be.”

  30. val says:

    A friend asked me to post this here:

    I’m 1 year off Benzos, and I am delighted to tell you I have my life back. I wondered if this day would ever come. I have some minor symptoms but they are still improving. The worse is I don’t sleep well as ‘Id like but I do sleep every night now, where I didn’t sleep so many nights during W/D. And I’m sure that will continue to improve.I consider myself healed.

    It’s been a long road. I took Klonopin for about a year. I knew it was addicting but had no idea how devastating the W/D could be. I decide to get off it I read that a taper over 8 weeks would work. I did that and although it was miserable I felt OK at the end of the 8 weeks. I was off Benzo for about 6 months when my mother got seriously ill and I had some tough decisions to make for her I was extremely stressed. I decided to go back on the Klonopin for a short time and then taper off like I did before. After about 2month I decided to go ahead with that plan. This time it was much worse. I’d found the Ashton Manual And switched to Valium which was a little better but still almost unbearable. I continued to work with great difficulty. When I got to 2mg. I was so miserable terrible insomnia and anxiety. Suicidal thoughts. Some one suggested a detox and I felt I had to do something so I went. They took me off the last 2mg in a week and my symptoms got worse. I kept thinking I’d be better in a couple of months at the most. After 3 months I was ready to give up and go back on them.

    I found a forum and the moderator told me if I went back on Benzo after that much time it wouldn’t work and I get worse. The symptoms were so unbearable and now I felt there was truly no way out. I couldn’t live without the drugs and I couldn’t live on them. I tried other drugs to ease the symptoms but nothing really helped. Suicidal thoughts were now with me 24/7 as I felt I could not live like that. I started drinking heavily and at 8 months off I got another prescription for Klonopin It seemed so hopeless I got drunk and OD on Klonopin. Wound up in the ER and in the psych hospita.l I went back on Klonopin with some relief but still didn’t feel well.

    I spoke with Dr Peart and started a very slow Valium taper which took 19 months to get off 1 mg of Klonopin.I suffer from constant fear anxiety, terrible insomnia and other symptoms. Depression and suicidal thoughts made me doubt I’d survive
    I often felt I’d never get better. I somehow managed to keep my job through it all. I was so close to retirement. I missed a lot of work and my productivity was way down. I’d been there close to 20 years and had good reputation that helped carry me through, when I know my co-workers wondered what was wrong with me. I blamed it on the stress of taking care of my Mom. She died in Dec 09′ I finished my taper March 9, 2010 The first 3 months off were only slightly better. By 6 months there was some noticeable improvement, since then it’s been slow and not at all linear.

    During this year I got off the propranolol and Trazadone I’d been taking for W/D symptoms. I had severe heart palpation during W/D which the Propranolol did help.Trazadone which did not really help my insomnia or depression much during W/D I taper slowly off both. No problems with the Propranolol and only minimal symptoms getting off the trazadone, the worse of which was increased depression which lasted about a month after I was off.

    I spent most of my W/D fearing I’d never get better and thinking I could not survive it. I had some great friends that supported me through this.. which I will always be grateful for. I’m still improving but I’m happy and grateful to have my life back.

    Reply:

    Val,

    Please tell your friend a big “THANK YOU” for sharing her story with us, and CONGRATS to her for making it through to recovery. Being able to read this is a gift of encouragement to others and we appreciate her taking the time to do so. Thank you, too, Val for the reassurance and hope you give to so many in ‘Benzo Land’. You are an earth angel!!

    Much Love & Gratitude,
    Bliss xxx

  31. Bliss says:

    Take care of yourself well & empower those you care about by saying a gentle but assertive “no” when you need to. Release any guilt, notions of martyrdom, inner conflict, or fear of rejection that may surface. If at first this is difficult to do, instead say, “I will get back to you.” Allow yourself time to connect with your feelings, check your schedule & decide without feeling pressured. Saying a sincere “no” is sometimes the kindest response. ~Bliss

    Taken from the Recovery Road Wellness FB page: http://www.facebook.com/RecoveryRoadWellness (Be sure to join if you’re on FaceBook!)

  32. Paul says:

    Reply to Paul:

    Paul! Yes, I remember you well… It’s great to hear from you although your news is not the best. I’m so sorry to hear that the symptoms have returned! Sheesh… However, this has happened to many others so try not to worry too much. Sometimes something like an antibiotic (or other medication), bad flu, sinusitis, dental work, funnily enough too much exercise or other strenuous physical activity can cause this kind of reaction even after a considerable period of time.

    I am actually communicating with others who are dealing with this and have chatted with some who had the same thing happen but are fully recovered now. So just trust and know that it’s a setback but it will pass. I remember you being a very positive person even when you were having a nightmare time, so I know you are coping well! :-)

    Re the spasms… They haven’t gone away completely but they’re much, much better than when we last communicated. Very brief, no pain, and I’m hardly ever aware of them. I feel wonderful compared to back then!

    I’m glad the book has helped Paul. If you feel up to it, do you mind leaving a comment on Amazon? We’re trying to collect as many comments as possible to help convey the message that these drugs do affect many people. You can change your name in your profile for privacy. Of course, there is no urgency and this is only if you feel like doing so.

    Well, you take good care of yourself. And if you need a word or two of reassurance, please be in touch.

    With thoughts of wellness,
    Baylissa

  33. Sonja says:

    i’m having more windows now. i guess i am finally healing. good to be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. hope everyone is okay too. Sonja

    Reply:

    Very good news, Sonja. Thanks for sharing. I know others will be encouraged by reading this. May your healing continue! :-)

    ~Bliss

  34. Shaila says:

    Hello,

    You say on your site that you will feel like you have arthritis in your joints when withdrawing? I feel like I have full body arthritis all of a sudden from taking benzos, tappering and now being off them totally for less than a week. Have you heard this is simply a side effect of taking the drugs and will be life long or have you heard of people having this and it eventually going away? Thank you.

    Reply:

    Hi Shaila,

    Yes, not everyone has this symptom during withdrawal but it is quite common and it does feel like it could be arthritis but it’s not! I had this really intensely along with other symptoms but it is now completely gone and it’s just a distant memory! Try not to worry and see if you can just accept it as a necessary part of and path to your healing. And don’t even think about it being lifelong! It’s just a withdrawal reaction which will eventually disappear like it has for all those before you, including me. Take good care of yourself and remember that no matter what symptom may surface, it is withdrawal induced and will go when your nervous system recovers. :-)

  35. Jane says:

    I am feeling good these day! Lots of improvements and the symptoms appear to be almost gone. I never thought this day would ever come! If you are giving up like I was - dont!!

    W/d was terrible for me fyi: terrible obsessive thoughts 24/7, head pain like a saw going down the middle and in my back, burning, upset stomach and always nauseous, agitation like I was wired!! LOL!!! Dpr, Dr, afraid of everything, afraid to go outside, always crying, shooting pains and much, much more. Bay always told me I am healing. I didn’t have any windows like some people so I found it hard to believe anything good was going to happen. Every day Bay would tell me to trust that I was healing.

    Angel Bay, thank you for being there for me when I thought I was going mad!!! LOL You are a special person and a blessing to all of us. I will come back to give an update soon. Wishing all of you healing too. Stay positive folks!!!

    Reply:

    Oh Jane, this is wonderful news!! Thank you for returning to let us know. It is always encouraging to those still coping with symptoms to be able to get this reassurance that, as we know, withdrawal is temporary. I remember how terrible it was for you and so to hear your brilliant news is just wonderful. You take good care of yourself, my friend. :-) And have a great time enjoying your life as a benzo-free and recovered survivor who has been through one of the worst experiences, and who will never be phased by anything life may now send her way! LOL

  36. Isa says:

    Hi Baylissa,

    Thank you for your book.

    I am 8 months off and having a really hard time. I have a question: It seems all my symptoms come every 2 or 3 days. They start when I am sleeping at night and the whole next day; the following day it is somehow a bit better until I am hit bad again 3 days later. Is this normal in withdrawal or should I look for something else? like MS or food sensitivities, etc.
    Thanks again

    Reply:

    Hi Isa,

    Thank you for sharing with us. I am so sorry to hear that you are having a hard time, even at 8 months off. I imagine you already know that is not unusual but just in case not, please be reassured that you are still within the normal time-frame for recovery.

    And yes, the pattern of waves that you describe is normal too. It is quite an individual thing with no rhyme or reason to it! But I have definitely heard of this pattern before. Please don’t even think about MS or food sensitivities. Once these symptoms appeared during or after your taper (or even in tolerance or inter-dose withdrawal), then they are withdrawal induced and will eventually go.

    I understand your thinking it could be something else - this happens often, but see if you can breathe through it, not resist what’s happening, and make the best of each day, despite having to cope with the symptoms. This too, shall pass. :-)

  37. Kathlyn Friedline says:

    wonderful site.. i really liked reading your posts.

  38. Anne says:

    Hi Baylissa,
    This may be an unusual question, but I was wondering if it’s ever possible to talk with you in person (via phone). I am most happy to pay for this, as your input would benefit me greatly. I am anticipating that this is something you just cannot provide, but I thought I would ask nonetheless.
    Yours in peace and healing,
    Anne

    Reply:

    Hi Anne,

    I do speak to benzo friends via Skype from time to time but mine isn’t working at the moment. I have ordered a new mic and hope to have it up and running again soon. Oh, Anne, I would never accept money for reassuring someone about withdrawal! But thanks for offering - that’s very kind of you. I’m hoping to acquire funding to run a formal Helpline but until then, let’s email, Skype, FaceBook and use whatever means we can to communicate.

    With thoughts of wellness,
    Baylissa

  39. Heather says:

    Become a possibilitarian. No mater how dark things seem to be or actually are, raise your sights and see possibilities-always see them for they’re always there.” -Dr. Norman Vincent Peale

  40. Teresa says:

    Hi Baylissa my main sxs are pullings and tawtness (muscle tightening)which is very painful and Involuntary spasms. I hav’nt done with my taper have it on hold until I am aware that my Pain has eased and I can withstand a cut. I overbreathe and make real funny noises like retching. My husband is very worried and concerned. However today I was shocked he is a Seaman and says he has to have a break/holiday as when he’s home he has to see to my elderly parents and Me….All this has done has made me feel terrible as he said I was selfish of which I am not. I am trying my hardest to not let it get to me. But I cannot read or watch t.v as I cannot concentrate….
    Anything you can say to encourage as I cannot always listen to your You tube Comments although it sounds very good……I too have the wackiest symptoms some you would’nt believe….they sound so strange. Bye for Now

    Reply:

    Dear Teresa,

    Thank you for sharing what has been happening with you. I am sorry to hear that you’re having these symptoms during your taper. What you describe is common though, so try to see if you can observe the symptoms and accept them as a part of the discontinuing/recovery journey.

    Maybe Hubby is close to becoming burntout - it’s very difficult for family and close friends to understand and relate to the withdrawal experience; and some find it harder than others. I hope the break he wants to take will give him renewed energy and he will be better able to cope and support you when he returns. Please don’t feel terrible! Family misunderstandings and strains in relationships tend to occur quite frequently during withdrawal. Don’t blame yourself. However your behaviour is manifesting, remember it is a result of your withdrawing and the brain changes that are taking place. Once this is all over, things will return to normal. You’ll be busy with life and benzos will be a distant memory, if one at all. :-)

    Try to find a breathing technique that will help you with the overbreathing and practise it often. If you look in the “Coping” section of this website - you’ll see some breathing techniques. I’m sure one of them will help. Here’s the link: http://recovery-road.org/resources-centre/coping/breathing-techniques/

    Well, take good care, Teresa. I hope this has helped. You will make it to being benzo free and eventually to full recovery. Your nervous system will take as much time as it needs but I’m sure you’ll find the patience and strength to help you cope.

    With thoughts of wellness,
    Baylissa

  41. Anne says:

    Dearest Baylissa and Chris,

    Thank you so much for your words of encouragement. I am trying so very hard to hang on and to embrace my symptoms and let them wash over me. I purchased your book Baylissa and it is wonderful. I’m struggling specifically with this recurrence - I can’t believe that I was doing fine and symptom free! It feels as though I must be in some minority of sufferers, who recover and then become ill again. Have you really seen people go on to recover once again? I have everything to live for. I have two little girls who would be lost without me. But at the moment I am struggling to hold on.
    I am hoping for health and peace for us all.

    Anne

    Reply:

    Dear Anne,

    Thank you for your reply. I am pleased to know that the book is helping. You aren’t in the minority at all. This can happen… sometimes a person has a very long window that makes it seem as if full recovery has taken place, only to have another wave of symptoms resurface.

    Anne, please don’t allow what has happened to scare you into thinking you won’t recover. Having a wave like this is perfectly normal, and people do go on to recover fully! Okay? :-) You DO have everything to live for and your little girls WILL have their mom who will be well again, just when the timing is right for you. Keep holding on and trust that your healing is taking place. It IS!!

    Bliss

  42. Carol says:

    Hello Baylissa,

    I don’t know if you remember me. Its Carol from Minneapolis I used to write to you alot when I cold turkey off ativan. thank you from the bottom of my heart. your book and your emails helped me through a awful time in my life. I’m feeling better now and started working again last month. The kids live me now and my life is getting back to nomrla just like you used to tell me it wud. the symptoms are gone just like you said! LOL your an angel to help us thru benzo hell. God bless u in your life. things will always work out good for you bliss. love u, carol

    Reply:

    Hi Carol,

    Thank you for taking the time to let us know that you’re better. This is wonderful news! I am very pleased for you and it’s great to know that you’re now able to have a normal life. You’ve made it through - I know you had a nightmare with just about every symptom. Well done and congratulations on your recovery! :-) May you now have a most enjoyable and fulfilling life.

    Much love to you too,
    Bliss

  43. Heather says:

    Nothing is hopeless; We must hope for everything.
    ~Madeleine L’Engle (A Wrinkle In Time)

  44. Bliss says:

    “No one can better bask in summer’s balm than those who have endured winter’s bite. Similarly, it is those who have suffered through life’s darkest hours who are able to truly savor the bright dawn of happiness. The person who has transformed the worst of fate into the best of fortune is life’s champion.” ~ D. Ikeda

  45. Chris says:

    Hello Anne,
    I’m sorry to hear about your setback. As Bliss would say keep telling yourself that this too shall pass. We’ll all make it thru just like all those before us. I have had setbacks too but I can tell that I’m healing. It has taken some time but I’m almost there. You’ll get through this rough patch.

    Chris

  46. Anne says:

    I found Baylissa and her website last year when I was in acute benzo withdrawal. I listened to her encouraging messages daily to help me through that very dark time. My withdrawal lasted from January to July and by September I was totally fine. I went back to work, back to life. I thought I was home free. In December I came down with a sinus infection. I felt fairly bad for a few weeks, but expected to recover fully in a short time. Little did I know that this infection (or the prescribed antiobiotics) would send me back into the horror of benzo withdrawal. I have been back in this very dark place for over two months now and feel that I may never get my life back again. I survived last spring, but can I really do it all again? I am scared and so, so sad - trying minute by minute just to get through each day. Thankfully I have a supportive husband who understands benzo withdrawal and has full confidence I will once again feel well. It is so hard to feel so sick day after day after day. I wish for healing, for me, for you, for us all.
    Blessings to all,
    Anne

    Reply:

    Anne,

    It’s me, Baylissa. I am really sorry about this setback. Sometimes sinusitis, flu and other types of viruses can trigger a wave of symptoms; this is very common. And it can be quite intense. To complicate matters, some antibiotics are just terrible triggers – for many people. So I think this is why you’ve had such a severe withdrawal reaction.

    I know it’s scary, Anne, but please know that even setbacks like these are overcome. Many, many people in withdrawal have had them. I have communicated with friends over the years who have had these reactions when it seemed that recovery was complete, and yet they go on to heal and eventually do get to that place of full recovery with no relapses. Please trust that this will happen for you too.

    I am glad your husband is supportive and reassuring. This helps so much. : -) Take good care of yourself at this time. Nurture yourself well and be gentle. Do only what you feel capable of doing. Breathe through it and take each day, hour, moment at a time. You only need to get through now and later will take care of itself. You have had long glimpses of what recovery will be like so please know that those times will come again and “This too, shall pass.”

    Gentle (((Hugs)))

  47. Bliss says:

    “Every situation, properly perceived, becomes an opportunity to heal.” ~ACIM

  48. Heather says:

    I gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which I must stop and look fear in the face…I say to myself, I’ve lived through this and can take the next thing that comes along…We must do the things that we think we cannot do.
    ~Eleanor Roosevelt

  49. Teresa says:

    Dear Teresa,

    Thanks for being in touch and for sharing your story. I’m really sorry to hear of all you’ve been through and can fully understand why you’re feeling scared. Please don’t be hard on yourself re the course your journey has taken. We can’t comment re the advice you’ve been given on tapering by the Helpline or any action taken by your doctors as we only give emotional support, but what we do know is that keeping your hope alive will certainly help you along the way! : -)

    Quitting benzos can be problematic for some but it is doable and we do eventually heal! So try not to let what’s happening now overwhelm you. Large doses of patience and acceptance of the symptoms will go a long way, and good breathing techniques and other coping tools will help too. You’ll get through this. Val gives great support and so you’re in good hands! :-)

    Wishing you all the best. Sincerely, ~Bliss

  50. Hoping says:

    thanx for the info on mindfulness and ur podcasts. i’m having bad symptoms but when i found ur site i started doing the mindfulness meditation and it helps a lot. i listen to ur youtube benzo coping video every morning. i fee much more hopeful and optmistic about recovery. this is a great website.

  51. Bliss says:

    A Blessing for Today… “May the stars carry your sadness away, may the flowers fill your heart with beauty, may hope forever wipe away your tears and, above all, may silence make you strong.”
    ~Unknown

  52. Bliss says:

    “Resistance is the thief; SURRENDER is the gift giver.” ~Guru Singh

  53. nick says:

    Hello Baylissa,

    I’ve read your book with great interest, it is truly awesome! I’m in the throes of a protracted w/d (+18 months free!) after a 7-8 years consumption of antidepressants mainly. Unfortunately i also took for a few months other psych drugs (neuroleptics and benzos) when i hit tolerance with my primary antidepressant (Paxil).
    This was just pure hell, i had turned into a zombie. Most of the psychiatrists are really just a bunch incompetent sadistic drug-dealers.
    I m 18 months free and have gotten rid of the mental/psychic symptoms -no anxiety, no insomnia, no depression (my original problems) -
    But, i still suffer a lot physically (burning pain, tinnitus, blurred vision, headaches), i m afraid to stay crippled that way. Will it ever go away - old same unrelenting question of the psych survivor…
    I keep walking of course and am determined to work on improving till my last breath.

    I d like to know if you’ve experienced some further improvements in your recovery, as of Feb.2011. Have you really reached the final Door, as you mentioned in your book?

    Thank you again for your book. It depicts almost exactly what i ve been (am) through.

    Big hug
    (i hope i m not too familiar :) )

    ———————————————-
    Reply:

    Hi Nick,

    Thanks for being in touch. First of all, no, you’re not being too familiar. We’re all friends and the website is meant to be informal. :-)

    I’m really pleased to hear that the book has helped you to cope. So sorry to know that you’re still having to endure the current physical symptoms. Everything you’ve described is common and at 18 months off, it means that more healing is taking place. You’ve asked, “Will it ever go away?” Over the years I have communicated with thousands of people in benzo, similar acting Z-drug and antidepressant withdrawal and I don’t know of anyone whose symptoms persisted indefinitely. I can’t see why it should be any different for you. Our bodies are so very self-healing… don’t be surprised if you end up feeling better than you have in many years! There are a few who end up with one or two symptoms that take longer to disappear but at 18 months off, it’s much too soon to even consider this question! Just keep taking care of yourself.

    Just one thought: If you are power-walking or walking for very long periods, it could be that your nervous system is being over-stimulated. If you’d like, you could cut down or omit the walking for some time just to see if the symptoms lessen in intensity. (Of course, if this does happen it could be coincidental but there’s no harm in trying.) Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best and hope that you will continue to see more and more improvements until you are completely recovered.

    Re my situation, yes, I have continued to have further improvements and feel wonderful. I still have the involuntary movements but the episodes are much briefer, there is no pain, and I can easily not even remember that I have them! Thanks for asking… It’s all good.

    Take good care of yourself and big hug back to you,
    Bliss

  54. Ryan says:

    I bought “Benzo-Wise” 18 months ago when I was beginning this journey and threw it away because I would not entertain the thought of a long withdrawal. All these months later, I bought another copy and have read it front to back in the last two days. It is truly one of the most comforting books I have read and I will strongly recommend it to anyone dealing with this nightmare, especially those in protracted withdrawal. God bless you for sharing your story.

  55. Chris says:

    Hope is important because it can make the present moment less difficult to bear. If we believe that tomorrow will be better, we can bear a hardship today. *** Thich Nhat Hanh

    Hope is definitely what’s keeping us going. Live in HOPE and GRATITUDE. Say “Thanks” in advance for RECOVERY. See yourself free of every symptom. Never give up HOPE. :-)

  56. Anon says:

    “Rise and rise again until lambs become lions.” – Robin Hood movie, 2010

  57. Ryan says:

    Wow, this site is bringing me a lot of comfort in a very difficult time. I am 15 months off benzos and really struggling. Three months ago, I was feeling significantly better but I am now in the midst of a 2 month setback and can’t seem to snap out of it. I have been obsessing about whether or not I did something to cause this and I just can’t think of anything. I don’t understand this. Any words of advice or encouragement would be greatly appreciated.

    ———————————————-

    Reply:

    Hi Ryan,

    I’m so sorry to hear that you’re having these challenges at fifteen months off. I know it can be discouraging to have this sort of setback after experiencing the kind of window you had three months ago. Try not to obsess about having done anything to trigger a setback. The nervous system has a way of recovering which has no pattern, rhyme or reason to it and with no scientific research, no one can really tell what triggers a wave. Even the most cautious of people sometimes end up having long periods where the symptoms are persistent. I always refer to this as the time when “deep healing” is taking place. :-) Try to see it as a positive.

    It is not uncommon to still be experiencing symptoms at fifteen months off so try not to worry too much. Coping with withdrawal requires a lot of patience! It really does! So, do everything you can to accept what is happening as a necessary path to your healing - a part of the recovery process. And, while you wait, continue to take good care of yourself - avoid stimulants, over-exerting and anything else that may prove to be too much for your nervous system at this time. Try the deep breathing and other coping tools (look under the Resources Centre section of this site for “Coping/Self-Help”).

    Focus on the things that uplift you and try not to get bogged down with too many negative stories. Withdrawal is temporary and one day all of this will be a faded memory for you. This too, shall pass!

  58. stayinpostive says:

    All you folks out there struggling with this nightmare i want to say to you don’t give up. like they tell you on this wonderful website we do get better. I had more than 80 symptoms and thought I was going to be permanently sick and sometimes I was convinced I was going to die, but one day my symmptoms went away and never came back. You’ve got to keep telling yourself that you are healing. It doesn’t matter if you are spaced out, in bad pain all over your body especially in the head back and neck like I was. I had burning all over, no memory and the worst thoughts that i can’t even repeat. nothing like that now. my life is good. i would say my life is better now because i don’t take things for granted anymore. Don’t let this get you down. like this Bliss ladys says you’ve gotta keep breathing and don’t fight the symptoms. just go with the flow. it took me some time to get well but i did. so keep the faith. good luck to everyone. stay positive.

  59. Steve says:

    Wow i am at .50 clonazpam and tapering off .25 xanax I at 1/4 xanax and was doing a 1/4 every week but have been having a rough time pins needles and twitching leg’s face eye’e My goodness I hope I can make it.

    Reply

    You WILL make it! Remember that the pins and needles, twitching, etc. are very common withdrawal symptoms. So try not to panic. Just breathe through it all and accept the symptoms as a necessary part of the recovery process. You will eventually be benzo-free and this experience will be behind you. For now, just take one day at a time and take good care of yourself. You WILL make it through this! :-)

    (If seeing your doctor will make you feel more reassured, then you should consider doing this (especially if s/he is knowledgeable about withdrawal). This is why tapering under medical supervision is necessary.)

  60. yourbenzofriend says:

    The winter of the soul, in its seeming barrenness, its times of seeming unproductivity, its times of silence and seeming stalemate, is perhaps its most important season. Without it, there is no recovery of freshness and vitality; no bursting forth in springtime splendor.

    ~Dwight Judy

  61. Steve says:

    Thanks Very much Bliss. Yesterday I had about 4 Hours of feeling Great. I am not sure how this happend I wish I had alot more.

    This is strange In 2000 I was on 6 to 8 mg of xanax a day and slowly got off without all this w/d. It has been about 2 years now of being on klonopin 1.5 mg and .25 mg of xanax. I think I am at 3 months now and I am at .50 mg klonopin and 1/4 of the .25 xanax. Knowing what I know now I think oh my God I wish someone would have screamed oh no do not take that when the doctor put me on klonopin. The w/d has been hell. I just have to say it again waking up one morning after about 4 hours of sleep walking the floor not sure of what was going on with Me.

    I found this site My Island in My storm mind You I have had alot of test and nothing was found. I thank God for a loving Wife. I was like a Kid on Christmas morning after finding this site I could not wait to tell My Wife. My mind had tried to make me think there was something else wrong with Me till I read some of the w/d that went along with coming of this drug.

    I just wanted to let each of You know much You sharing Your stories about Your w/d has helped Me keep My right mind. I keep each of You close to My Heart and in My Thoughts and Prayers Each Day. One of My wishes for today is that each of You have a little ray of sunshine in Your day. I think of this Like a ship We are all in We are paddling together some day’s My paddle does not reach the water too good and Yours does so on these days We help each Other out. We will get this Ship To where We are headed By being a Team. Thanks From My Heart to Yours for being on My Team.

  62. Steve says:

    Hello I know I have not posted in a while I hope Everyone is getting better. I have a question has Anyone had muscle cramps in there low back I go to bed and wake up about 4 hours later with these knots in My low back and My leg’s feeling like pins and needles and I still have quivering from my lower stomach to My chest. I use heat and massage. I also work with My breathing. This seems to help alot. Thanks Steve.

    Hello Steve,
    Thank you for updating us. I hope someone will reply to your question soon. In the meantime I’ll just share that this symptom has been reported by others. It’s typical of withdrawal and usually goes with time. I’m pleased to hear that the heat and massage work for you. It’s funny how a remedy that works for one person can sometimes cause problems for another. I remember reacting badly to massage, as have others. So this is good news. And yes, you can’t go wrong with the breathing - it’s an amazing coping tool! I hope you’ll begin to see improvements in your symptoms soon and wish you all the best. ~Bliss

  63. Heather says:

    Faith is a bird that feels dawn breaking and sings while it is still dark. ~Rabindranath Tagore

  64. Danny says:

    I am new to these forums. I underwent a CT detox from Valium 27 months ago and for the 1st year I was on an anti dep (Mirtazapine) and my symptoms were quite moderate. After coming off the AD 15 months ago my symptoms and many new ones including burning, itching, muscle pain, fatigue, tinnitus, vibrations, tension, insomnia, etc (I have over 25) got MUCH worse. I have been so terrified that I will never get well. After seeing what many of you have written here it gives me hope that I will one day get ‘ME’ back again. Thank you so very much, you don’t know how much this has helped me.

    ———————————————-

    Reply:

    Danny,

    Thank you for writing in. I’m so sorry to hear that your symptoms have intensified. Try not to worry too much. This is common. The antidepressant would have masked some of the symptoms but think of it now as the “real” healing taking place. Your nervous system will now get the opportunity to heal completely so in one way, what you’re experiencing is a good thing! :-) All you can do now is just take one day at a time and allow your recovery process to unfold. Your receptors will heal in time, and try not to anticipate how long it will take. It might be sooner than you think, or you may need more time. Just trust that the process will be exactly as it should, in order for you to resume normal life. Patience, acceptance and hope will be your best companions while you wait! Breathe deeply and keep telling yourself that “This too, shall pass.”

    With thoughts of wellness,
    ~Bliss

  65. Sue says:

    That quote made me smile when I thought of the pears as recovery and if I am patient it will fall in my lap but if I try to force it I will make things worse. I can relate!

  66. Sue says:

    A man watches his pear tree day after day, impatient for the ripening of the fruit. Let him attempt to force the process, and he may spoil both fruit and tree. But let him patiently wait, and the ripe fruit at length falls into his lap.
    Abraham Lincoln

  67. mjisfree says:

    Bliss i had to come back and thank you. every day you used to tell me i was healing and i used to find it difficult to beleive. the symptoms wouldn’t let up and i was in a lot of pain and mental anguish but i kept breathing like you said and i wouldn’t stop telling myself i was getting better. it’s been a while since i have had a symptom. like 5 months. I feel great. i feel better than i can remember even before the celexa and xanax. this stuff is toxic. i never thought i would heal but i have. all you folks out there don’t give up. we get better.

  68. Jo says:

    I got your book and it helps me a lot. I read it everyday. It made me find my own way to cope with the terrible symptoms. What I do is breathe in deeply and say “i’m doing okay” then I breathe out slowly. Then I breathe in again and say “i am healing” and breathe out slowly. I do this until I calm down and I do it regardless of what is going on with me. I used to freak out a lot because of the burning, pain, tingling, intense anxiety, etc. but I’m feeling so much better and very optimistic about recovering. Thanks for a great website and book. They are a godsend. All the best to everyone. We are all healing. Jo

  69. Heather says:

    “Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark.” -George Iles
    Keep the faith that “this too shall pass” and that you WILL make it to the light of recovery.

  70. Baylissa says:

    My dear Friends and Site Visitors,

    I know that for most of you this year was extremely challenging. You’ve had to cope with unrelenting symptoms and all the repercussions… But new beginnings await… Recovery is right on schedule. Let the wings of HOPE take you into this new year. May it bring you full recovery, prosperity, love and happiness - everything you desire for yourselves and more.

  71. Steve says:

    Hello It has been a rough time the last 3 weeks pins and needles and tingling in
    My leggs and head also some burning rubber legg feeling. I did get my test back on my leggs and I have good blood flow and no clots. The Doctor thought the muscle pain could have been circulation. I had a loss in My Family and had to be out of town for two weeks I guess the stress really set Me off bad.I did remember the breathing You have on here that was a life saver it really calmed me down. I think about each of You everyday and hope You are making progess. I am still at .50 mg down from 1.50 mg. Thanks so very much for this site and the People being so kind to share. Good luck Everyone We are going to beat this We are not quiters. Best Reguards to Everyone sorry for the long post.

    ———————————————-
    Reply:

    Dear Steve,

    Thank you for sharing your experience with us. I am so sorry for your loss and also to hear that you’re having to deal with these uncomfortable symptoms. They are common during withdrawal (withdrawal induced) and so it’s no surprise that your test results were normal. This tends to be the case. Yes, the breathing exercises are very powerful and I am really pleased for you that they have helped to calm you down. I wish you all the best with the rest of your taper. Eventually you will be benzo free and enjoying a new beginning. Thanks for the kind wishes to everyone. And you’re right - people who go through withdrawal are definitely winners!! :-)

    All the best to you and yours in 2011,
    ~Bliss

  72. nursing jobs says:

    Great site. A lot of useful information here. I’m sending it to some friends!

  73. Anon says:

    Never fear shadows…. that always means there is a light shining somewhere.
    - Jonathan Santos

  74. Sally says:

    someone sent me this quote……I have to post it here. “The road that is built in hope is more pleasant to the traveler than the road built in despair, even though they both lead to the same destination.” by Marian Zimmer Bradley

    this is true for us. we will all recover tho some quicker than others, but if we take the journey never losing sight of hope, keeping hope in our hearts, it will be much, much better than if we are in despair all the time, if we worry and fret about the symptoms and forget that one day WE WILL HEAL.

    happy weekend to everyone. let’s keep HOPING!!

  75. Rodney says:

    Today 12/14/2010 I am 38 months off Benzodiazepines and SSRI’s. I thought I would be recovered my now but I am not. I have numerous symptoms daily that can come and go at any given time. I was never like this until I was prescribed Benzodiazepines and SSRI’s.This has effected me in many way emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially. The mental anguish and torment these drugs has brought to my life can not be measured. The people who prescribed these drugs need to be accountable for there actions. These are the list of the symptoms I experience and this is subject to change hourly or daily without notice. Emotional Blunting, Emotional Amnesia, Avoidance/Agographobia, Fatigue/Exhaustion, Brain Fog/Brain Cloudiness, Lethargy, Forgetfulness/Absentmindedness, Derealization, Depression, Insomnia, Tinnitus, Anxiety\Palpitations, Serotonin/GABA inbalances, No Energy Lack of Vitality, Cognitive decline/Memory issues.

    I never had any of these symptoms prior to being prescribed Benzodiazepines and SSRI’s. I’m sure many of you can relate to this long enduring road to recovery.
    Rodney

    ————————————————

    Reply:

    Thank you, Rodney, for sharing what has been happening with you as you make your way to full recovery. And CONGRATS on being 38 months benzo free!! :-) I am sorry to hear that you’re having such a rough recovery journey.

    Yes, withdrawal can be a very challenging process and can impact life in many ways. Just keep trusting that your healing is taking place, even if at times, when the symptoms are intense, it seems a remote concept. We have been blessed with amazing bodies - very resilient and self-healing. There is soooo much that the nervous system can withstand! So, dig deep down for more patience and keep that fire of hope burning. As devastating as withdrawal can be, the reality is that it is a temporary situation and sometimes a necessary path to recovery. Many have felt that it would never end or that major damage had been done, only to find that the symptoms disappeared and life returned to normal, often better than it was before!! Take good care of yourself at this time, one day… one moment at a time. This too, shall pass…

  76. Libby says:

    “When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing one of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or You will be taught to fly” Patrick Overton

  77. Medical Jobs says:

    This is such a great resource that you are providing and you give it away for free. I enjoy seeing websites that understand the value of providing a prime resource for free. I truly loved reading your posts. Thanks!

  78. free government grants says:

    found your site on del.icio.us today and really liked it.. i bookmarked it and will be back to check it out some more later

  79. Heather says:

    Hope is always available to us. When we feel defeated, we need only take a deep breath and say, “Yes,” and hope will reappear.
    ~ Monroe Forester

  80. healingeveryday says:

    Hope keeps me going. I have bad symptoms but everyday I tell myself they are this bad because deep, deep healing is going on inside! LOL I decided that since freaking out and worrying doesn’t help anyway I might as well do like Bliss says and focus on recovery. My affirmation is that “Every day in every way I am getting better and better.” I don’t need to know every detail about how this is happening, I just know that IT IS.

  81. Ashley says:

    This site is wonderful. I am 5 months off all benzos and recovery is slow and painful. This has been an incredibly hard week for me. I hate being sick, and am full of impatience because I want my suffering to end. I believe it will, because I have to. All of us will heal. Our bodies and minds are healing every day. Remember, recovery is not linear. Remember to breathe- healing is taking place all the time. I wish all of you healing, and am eternally grateful for sharing your thoughts and experiences.

    Reply: Thank you Ashley! Yes, recovery can be slow and painful at five months off but you’re so right to keep believing that you will heal. Tens of thousands before you have, and you will too! :-) Great attitude and advice - thanks for sharing.

  82. Steve says:

    I am so happy I found this site My Wife is always telling me things will get better. Less than 2 years ago I had a toxic reaction to avalox after 2 doctors told me I have nerve damage from this and muscle twitching that they ruled out als and was put on clonazepam I was taking 1.5 mg a day 2 times I have tried to get off this not knowing that cold turkey was not the way to do it I would make it 72 hours the first time and right at 80 the next. I am down to.50mg right now and am having my right eye buzzing and deep burning in my legg,s and feet pins and needles muscle jerks and electric feeling going down both leggs and My stomach quivers and chest neck and arms. Let Me say how much I thank You for shareing I thought I was going crazy and now I know I am not the only one with this. My Heart goes out to Everyone with this happening to them. Thanks so much for having this site.

    ————————————————

    Reply:

    You are welcome, Steve, and thank you for sharing your story. We are pleased to know that you’ve found this site to be helpful. Everything you’ve described is typical of withdrawal - the buzzing, burning, pins and needles, muscle jerks, etc. so try to not let them distress you too much. They won’t last forever - this is just what happens while your nervous system adjusts to the reductions in your taper. Once you’re completely benzo free and the recovery process is complete, you’ll feel like a new person. :-) In the meantime, take good care of yourself. Acceptance, patience, hope, focusing on the positives, being kind and gentle with yourself, breathing, etc. will all help to make your journey “lighter”…. All the very best to you.

  83. Chris says:

    I know that I am healing. I will never stop believing it. Why shouldn’t I heal? Too many before me are better now. My nervous system is healing. This is my truth.

  84. Eliseo Dellaca says:

    Love your site man keep up the good work

  85. val says:

    This is an email from a recovered BZ friend of mine:

    “Every time we have a downturn it feels like the worst…always makes us lose hope…always feels permanent;that’s the nature of the beast……don’t believe it or buy into it. It is just our brain body on pause, trying to heal and recharge its batteries….healing is painful ….this is just a temporary it will pass.

    Don’t lose hope!
    Don’t give up!”

    (Thank you Val - you’re an Earth Angel. :-) )

  86. Libby says:

    I can feel my brain healing although the symptoms are still here. I will never give up hope of my recovery. I fully expect to be healed and I will feel this way until my symptoms go. Nothing is going to make me lose hope or faith. I deserve to be healthy and I accept this truth. I KNOW my healing is taking place. This thanksgiving I am grateful and most of all I am grateful for my health.

  87. davids says:

    I am 37 months off a c/t. I am still so miserable. This is relenting. Brain fog, head pain, anxiety, insomnia, derealization, dizzines, fatigue. Any words of hope from anyone this far out and healed? Thanks!!!

    ————————————————

    Reply:

    David, we are very sorry to hear that things are still bad for you at 37 months off. All the symptoms you describe are typical of withdrawal and yes, this can happen even at the stage, so try not to give up hope. We know it can be disheartening and frustrating to have to cope with persistent symptoms but keep trusting that despite this, your recovery is taking place (because it is! :-) ). Try to do whatever you know helps you to cope - maybe using a breathing technique or speaking positively to yourself, avoid stimulants and over-exerting yourself, and look after yourself well. As you know, withdrawal is temporary - it’s just that for some people it may last longer than others. But this does not mean you won’t heal. It just means that your nervous system needs more time to heal. So, dig deep down for more patience and keep believing… hoping… knowing.. that this too, shall pass.

  88. Cindy says:

    I was able to recover in 1999 with the love and support of a naturopathic practitioner. One of the first things I did to help reverse my repetitive negative “I’m never going to get well” thinking, was to write on dozens of index cards,I AM HEALING, and post them all over my house. Everywhere my eyes landed I was reminded that I was healing, and before long, ALL of my benzo symptoms healed. Believe it and you too will see it.

    Blessings, love and encouragement to all of you as you continue down your path to total recovery.

  89. Anon says:

    “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, “I will try again tomorrow.” M.A.Radmacher

  90. Bliss says:

    “Do not anticipate trouble or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.” ~Benjamin Franklin

    Dear Friends, Please don’t worry about what may never happen. Many of you have written to express your concerns regarding recent benzo news. Don’t worry, Don’t worry, Don’t worry! Don’t anticipate the worst! Our lobbyists must focus on the most extreme cases and issues in order to put an end to the benzo madness. It is necessary and badly needed and we are grateful.

    Meanwhile, back on the Benzo Ranch, we must keep in the sunlight! The reality is that worrying does not prevent anything from happening. Instead, it heightens anxiety and intensifies symptoms. So, stay focused on being well, on recovery, on all things positive and of the light. Patience, courage, hope and acceptance will lead your way on this journey. THIS TOO, SHALL PASS…

  91. admin says:

    No matter what you may be having to cope with today, keep trusting that YOU ARE HEALING.

    Even if you are having troubling psychological or physical symptoms, keep trusting that YOU ARE HEALING.

    Even if you have read disturbing stories that make you doubt that you’ll fully recover, keep trusting that YOU ARE HEALING.

    Even if you cannot see the light at the end of the journey, keep trusting that YOU ARE HEALING.

    No matter what today brings you, keep trusting, dig deep down into that well of courage that you may not even know you have, AND KEEP YOUR HOPE ALIVE.

    Know that THIS TOO, SHALL PASS…

    Sending Light and thoughts of Wellness to all,
    ~Bliss

  92. Jules says:

    @Benzonomore…me too!!! most of my symptoms are gone and i was scared to say but i dont think their coming back its been 15 weeks. i am in shock but very happy too. relief and now i dont know what to do with myself. :-) awesome

  93. BenzoNoMore says:

    At last the light is here! Can’t belive more than 4 years of torture with my head hurting like it was splitting in two, shooting pains, sensation of my head being sawed, vibrations, unbearable pain all gone!!!!!! WAHEY!!! Most of it stopped in June but didn’t want to jinx it by saying anything. TBH I expected it to come back. Now been months since I had a symptom. After 4 years I can sleep again. I am beside myself HAPPY. Thank you Baylissa for telling me over and over again to think and say I was recovering. I remember asking you how can I say I am healing when I am in so much pain and you gently insisted I was. I did say the affirmations and they kept me pretty hopeful. Girl your an angel.

    I am sayin goodbye with these words of encouragement: When it feels like the symptoms wont give you a break keep trusting, keep hoping, keep brave because this sh** WILL END ONE DAY. Look for reasons to smile, look for things to be grateful about, give a helping hand when you can, stay away from negative people, stay away from pills, alcohol, analyzing. Don’t overdo anything. This stuff goes away. THERE COMES A TIME WHEN WE HEAL. I’m outta here and off to live my life. Baylissa your amazing!! THANX

  94. admin says:

    Alan,

    Thanks for your query and for your kind words of encouragement to those in withdrawal. Benzo withdrawal poses many challenges for loved ones too, so we appreciate what you must be going through. In response to your query: you may find the forums useful — there will be others with similar circumstances. Here is the page with the links to the forums.

    http://recovery-road.org/information/forums-fora/

    Also, there is some information for family members on this page:

    http://recovery-road.org/for-caregivers/family/

    Wishing you all the very best

  95. Jess says:

    “Life isn’t that unfair, really. In every test that it sends us there’s an opportunity.” -Giacomo Campiotti

    I know that something good will come out of this situation. I can’t say what it is yet but time will tell. I will cling to hope and keep trusting.

  96. Alan says:

    Is there any place out there I can find a support group for those coping with a loved one going through the Benzo WD process??? I have no one to talk to and want so much more to understand and be able to better support my wife… Please any help would be greatly appreciated, and to all of you going through your own struggles please remember it gets better… The road is what you make of it and nothing has so much control as to set your destiny for you… I send you all support and strength…

  97. Chris says:

    “Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better.” :-)

  98. Ricardo says:

    this has been a long nightmare for me. took ativan for many years quit cold turkey.. withdrawal for more years than you could imagine.. sometimes okay sometimes flare up. sometimes improving sometimes felt worse than when i just quit. i never gave up on healing. had great time no symptoms for a few years then symptoms returned full blow. now symptoms gone again. because it doesn’t get better right away doesn’t mean it won’t get better at all. benzo withdrawal can be beaten even if it takes many, many years. i know full healing is my fate. i have to keep the hope going. healing to you all.

  99. kfz versicherung vergleich says:

    last week our group held a similar talk about this topic and you point out something we have not covered yet, thanks.

    - Kris

  100. Heather says:

    “Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”
    ~Martin Luther King, Jr.

  101. Nona says:

    I can see, I can stand, I can walk, I can eat a little, I can sleep a little, I can talk, I am alive, I have a lot to be thankful for.

  102. Pharmk859 says:

    Hello! interesting site!

  103. Chris says:

    “The two most powerful warriors are patience and time.” Leo Tolstoy

  104. BenzoSurvivor says:

    I am breathing slowly and telling myself that I am healing. I will look back at this time and smile because I made it!!!

  105. Ruth says:

    I am only 20 days off my Benzo - I am so glad to have found this site. I am suffering more than I knew was possible. I am hoping to gain some encouragement and comfort from the messages I read here. This is such a difficult time, but when I see that others can do it, it gives me HOPE.

  106. Heather says:

    A little affirmation to remind us that we are constantly healing, we can’t see it with our eyes, but it is happening!
    He who creates also re-creates.
    I am being re-created now.
    The life force is filling me to overflowing.
    I am well, healthy, strong.
    I thank God, my Creator, my Re-creator.
    Health, vigor, energy, has come to me.
    Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

  107. BenzoSurvivor says:

    “If you will call your troubles experiences, and remember that every experience develops some latent force within you, you will grow vigorous and happy, however adverse your circumstances may seem to be.”

    John Heywood

  108. Thankful says:

    Well, imagine you’ve come off your benzos and you don’t know what in blazes name is going on and the you find this amazing website!! About as good as it gets. This is great. Thank you!!!!!!

  109. Chris says:

    I can’t think now so I will go lie down and dream of what life will be like when I recover. I am grateful for my healing.

  110. I'masurvivor says:

    I feel happy that I am finally losing weight. It has been a long road and I almost gave up on looking anything close to how I did before the benzo. My benzo belly is going and my digestion is improving. :-) Doing a happy dance!!!!

  111. Chris says:

    Today I am thankful for my eyesight because I can read, watch tv and see the caring and concerned looks on the faces of those who love me. :-)

  112. Judy says:

    Al,

    I read your comment of today. I would, very much, like to learn more about your success! Is there anyway we can get in touch? Feel free to contact me at JESurfing24@yahoo.com.

    I’d appreciate it! Struggling with tapering off of Klonopin. Down to .875 mgs. Having hideous burning, stinging, vibrations, pinching, etc. in my lower back. Can’t seem to get below .875 mgs.

    Hope to hear from you!

    Thank you!

    Judy

  113. Al says:

    I suffered with terrible symptoms for over 4 years and I almost gave up. i quit cold turkey off xanax, valium and effexor and had awful obsessive thoughts, parnoia, the burning and pain was a nightmare because I had it all over my body, nightmare head pains which were the worse, muscle spasms, electric shocks, digestive problems, i cannot name all the symptoms because had about 80 in all and they were very intense. I was confined to bed some of the time and house bound for the rest of the time. I didn’t have the windows like some people do, it was hell 24/7.

    I came here to tell you folks out there that you must never give up. If i healed anybody can. I did try supplements, green drinks and other things but they did not help and i think made me worse. I stuck to a bland diet, no vitamins, no alcohol, no caffeine and no sugar. These things rev up the system so if you are in a bad way like i was don’t take them.

    I haven’t had any symptoms for months now. i feel 100% recovered and it is a great feeling!! hang in there. don’t give up, don’t give up, don’t give up.

    Al

  114. Judy says:

    Dear Baylissa,

    I just discovered that you have a new site! It is beautiful! So much has happened for you created your original site, hasn’t it? I am so pleased for you.

    I will never forget the support that you, (and your former site) provided me during the days of my cold-turkey. I have told you before, but, I’ll say it again: I could not have gotten through those days without your writing to me, without the information that you had on your site.

    I hope that millions of people discover your site! Millions will be able to recover, due to all of your efforts.

    How great this must feel, to be able to help so many “benzo” sufferers.

    I hope, as well, that MANY doctors and other medical professionals, access this site so that they, too, can learn and learn the truth!

    God bless you for all that you have done to heal yourself and all you have done to bring healing to others.

    Most sincerely,

    Judy

  115. BenzoNoMore says:

    Today I will be gentle with myself. I will do only what feels comfortable. I will look after myself and treat myself in a special way. I will remind myself that I am healing.

  116. benzosurvivor says:

    Of all ills that one endures, HOPE is a cheap and universal cure.

    ~Abraham Cowley

  117. admin says:

    Laura, I am so sorry to hear that you are having these symptoms. All you’ve described are typical of withdrawal. Being on a benzo for longer than 2 to 4 weeks is classed as long term and, therefore, these symptoms can be experienced. Please don’t give up hope. :-) Many who have had these symptoms are much, much better now. If those who healed came back to share their stories you would find that thousands before you have had these intense symptoms and are now well again. It is not unusual for symptoms to take longer than 3 months to go, so please give your nervous system more time to heal. Try not to panic and just breathe into the moment. The best way is to accept the symptoms and take things one day at a time. Focus on the positive stories. You WILL make it through this.

  118. Laura says:

    I am looking for hope and inspiration …

    (Email edited by Admin)

  119. Vi says:

    I found Baylissa and her original website almost 3 years ago. I was in my second or third month of acute WD at the time. I had a myriad of acute, unrelenting symptoms for 9 months and I did not (could not) leave my house during that time. I was terrified.

    I put almost all Baylissa’s suggestions into practice, even when I didn’t think they were working. I can remember her saying “Affirmations have no negative side effects.” and I thought, What do I have to lose? The help, support and suggestions on her website and in her book got me through the most difficult time in my life.

    I just passed the 3 year mark of my Benzo free anniversary. My healing was slow and I attribute that to a cold turkey WD. I do not suggest that to anyone. I thought I was different and that I could do this WD thing by myself. I was wrong.

    I felt much better w/ intermittent symptoms after 15 months. I was out in the world and among the living. I knew every time I experienced a symptom it was my body and my brain healing. I did not feed into the fear, I used an affirmation or some diaphragmatic breathing or meditation and I was able to live life, even with some pretty scary symptoms. I still have mild symptoms but they are much fewer and further apart than ever before. I know one day I will be fully healed.

    Thank you Baylissa for all your help, hope and the courage to post your experience to help others. You have touched my life for the better.

  120. Dan says:

    i came here to check out the new website and thought i would drop a line of encouragement to those of you still healing. i never knew i would feel this good again. Ativan for 11 years and my withdrawal felt like it would never end. i counted more than 80 symptoms. 4 and half years off and i feel great. i don’t take any meds and take care of my body better than i used to. life is much better and no anxiety. hang in there. you will recover.

  121. Rod says:

    I never thought I would heal but I did. I’m 95% healed, the other 5% left is Tinnitus and some brain fog, I nap when my body says nap,I couldn’t leave the house for 2 years,I’m on my 3rd year now and I leave the house every day rain or shine. You must trust, I know it’s hard to do
    but you can do it. You will recover. Tell yourself, I will recover. 3 years Ativan free!!! Much love to you all. Rod.
    PS Love to you Baylissa You are my #1 Angel.

  122. Fran says:

    I was giving up hope as one of my symptoms seemed to be never going away. I woke up this morning and it is much, much better. I am happy, happy, happy. Wishing all of us healing.

  123. benzosurvivor says:

    I am discovering a strength in me that I never knew I had. It feels good. :-0

    “In the depth of winter I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer.”
    - Albert Camus

  124. Amy says:

    “Healing takes courage, and we all have courage, even if we have to dig a little to find it.”
    Tori Amos

  125. benzosurvivor says:

    If you’re scared, just holler and you’ll find it aint so lonesome out there. - Joe Sugden

  126. Rhetta says:

    Just know that whatever you are doing, wherever you are, your healing is taking place and all things are working for your highest good!!

  127. anna says:

    sometimes i cant help it. i freak out when day after day this madness is going. when my doctor says it can’t be withdrawal i get really worried. this site makes me calm. i feel positive now. i WILL GET THROUGH THIS!!!

  128. Mike says:

    Glorius sunshine today. Have a good one all.
    ;-)

  129. Chris says:

    I like this quote for us:

    “Healing takes time. Despite great advances in medicine, the biggest part of your recovery is attributable to the enormous healing power
    inside you. The body heals itself according to its
    own timetable - anxious thoughts never hasten recuperation.”

    Criswell Freeman

  130. Amy says:

    Let nothing disturb you.
    Let nothing frighten you.
    All things pass away.
    God never changes.
    It is with patience that
    All things are completed.
    For those who have God
    Nothing is lacking.
    God alone is sufficient.

  131. Bliss says:

    My friends, we lost all the quotes and clichés from the old site but I’m in the process of compiling a new page with more, as well as positive statements. In the interim, here are a few that I recall:

    “Fall down seven times, stand up eight.”

    “The longest road turns.”

    “Time heals.”

    “Everything will be okay in the end, if things aren’t okay, it’s not the end.”

    “There is a light at the end of the tunnel.”

    “Behind the clouds the sun is shining.”

    “No illness lasts a hundred years.”

    “Soon this will be a distant memory.”

    “A bend in the road is not the end of the road unless you fail to make the turn.”

    “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow. ~Mary Anne Radmacher

    “The difficulties of life are intended to make us better, not bitter.”

    And my mum’s favourite: “This too, shall pass.”

    Today I am grateful that my memory is sooooo much improved!! :D :D :D

  132. Chris says:

    Today is scary. My symptoms are intense and I don’t feel right but a voice in my head keeps telling me I am going to be okay. I am listening and trusting and hoping and praying and the more I do that the more I feel that I AM going to be very very okay. Last Christmas Baylissa told me to keep looking to the sun and all the shadows will fall behind me. This is what I am doing today. For all of us still healing we will get there one day.

  133. BenzoNoMore says:

    My DH is an amazing guy! I have been like a zombie during this nightmare and he is very supportive. I just want to express my appreciation for his love and care. He is my angel. :-)

  134. Heather says:

    I am grateful to God for getting me through one day at a time.
    I am grateful to Baylissa for her energy, light and positivity through her book and web creations.
    I am grateful that I have been able to participate in more of life’s activities.
    I am grateful that I may pray for each of you that you will be strengthened and healed.

  135. admin says:

    We are never given more than we can handle. Just when you think you have no more strength or courage to cope, you find extra reserves from somewhere. Keep the hope alive and keep trusting that your recovery is unfolding in the way that is just right for you! I see you VIBRANT, HEALTHY & WHOLE ♥♥♥.

  136. Elizabeth says:

    This morning my 8 year old held my hand and looked at me. She told i’m going to get better because she prayed hard for mom to get better and be like before. :-) I had to hold back the tears but in my heart I knew her prayers will be answered.

  137. Rhetta says:

    This website is the most complete, informative and resourceful site that I have found in my benzo experience. It gives me a great deal of hope and support to cope. Thank you for leading me on this road to recovery!

  138. Amy says:

    I was feeling very down today. Worried about my symptoms because i stopped work and need to get back. i was very, very sad and scared about losing my home everything my head was spinnin. I listened to your podcast about positve talk and i tried it. i feel diferent now more optamistic. thanx i will listen every day. :-)

  139. Jay says:

    Now off ativan going on 4 ytears. My withdrawal was a ngihtmare. Now is mostly over and I feel good most of the time. Never give up. Never think you are not healing. Keep thinking positive even when it feels like you gonna die! You’ve gotta go through it to get out of it and you will get out of it. Keep the faith. Jay

  140. kittenmittens says:

    I am very happy to have found this page, it is very uplifting

  141. Libby says:

    I am feeling a lot better today. I notice my head pain and numbness are not as bad as last few months. At last I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. :)

  142. benzohead says:

    my happy thought The good thing that has happened to me today is this new website. still having a lotta symptomsbut so much good stuff is here. Today I am clinging to hope of a full recovery. I am thankful that I have my forum, this site and my benzo friends to talk to. and hey, the sun is still shining. lol

  143. Chris says:

    Your new website is great!!! I am loving it. Thank you!

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